New Place, Same Problems

Nearly a month before we began to move, I began to get constant headaches and migraines. Sure, it happens all the time, but so consistently and so many times in a row? I remember I started taking headache medicine when I was four or five years old, it's just been a 'natural' thing all my life. But they keep getting worse--the worse one I had at :devHikari-Collection:'s and :devHumanStick:'s house when we all use to live in the same area. It was so bad I collapsed and had to stay there for the night. Even :devHail-Storm: stayed over that night, and they all checked up on me, so sweet of them. Wow, that was what, about three years ago?

Anyways, I know I really shouldn't be complaining. Hail gets bad headaches, as do anyone else. But I feel like complaining so I may as well, yes xD? I've had two migraines just as bad as I had the one three years ago in the span of a month. I can't even begin to explain what they feel like. But I'm more sick and miserable than usual, so I've been retreating to some things.

One--books. Though it doesn't help the headaches much, sometimes I can get so into the book that the pain is ignored for a time.
Two--FeelRO, it's a good online game where I have met the most awesome people (along with jerks--but hey xD)that help me along. My adopted Guild is awesome! It's a big family who support each other as we work on leveling our characters and collecting equips and such.

Sleep use to be a retreat, but it isn't anymore. It's so painful both mentally and physically. I'm sure that confuses you, so I'll explain lol. My dreams are horrible that usually consist of fire and other such things made unpleasant, I won't go into it. The physical part is, no matter how well I manage to sleep on just my back, my right shoulder and collar bone are up to their most painful state yet. I wake up in so much pain I nearly cry. So I have to rotate my shoulder and arm to pop it a lot until the pain dies down. I can't tell you guys just how MUCH I want to get a dang X-ray and see what's wrong! It feels like more than just a tissue issue (hah xD!). As for those headaches and migraines...ugh. I had a CAT Scan years ago and even tried glasses, didn't work. In all, nothing has. But I'm still trying, even to the point where I sit there and try to convince myself that I don't have a headache.

I love my mom, but she isn't a help at all, really. She is stressed beyond reason because, just very recently, we discovered that we can't have money for Christmas or much for...anything, really. The bills keep coming and things keep dragging us down. She gets mad at me for sleeping--when I manage to--and I'm going...AHH! EXCUSE ME? I can't help these headaches and she knows it, she just feels the need to lash out and I'm the only target who can decently take it. When the migraines come, the only thing that helps is NyQuil, but I have to be careful with that.

Mom has her new job now, so I'm being patient with her and helping reassure her that we'll be caught up sooner than later, then we can start to get things to make our life more comfortable. We want to take a college course together (haven't decided), buy a better TV, get health insurance, a better house...I'm glad I'm here with my mom, and she's told me more than once my presence is appreciated. My 'job' right now is Nanny--I make sure Hunter is safe, play games with him, help him with homework and make sure things at school are running smoothly. Mom can't do much of that since she is working. More than one person has told me this is no life at all...but I refuse to leave my little brother alone, like I was forced to be so much in my youth. He's a smart kid, I know he'll be a great person for the world to see.

I've always been guessing this, but I know most of my headaches come from stress. Sometimes I'm so stressed I don't noticed I'm stressed...if that makes sense? Well, all I can do is keep on trying and pray that I'm okay and my health will get better!

Thanks for reading!